As of tomorrow, not only will I "turn" 28 weeks pregnant, but it will have been a week since I last saw Luke. He has been in Canada on a fishing, camping, and canoeing trip with his dad, brothers, some family, and friends. He is due back here on Sunday, and I can't freaking wait until I see him. Really, tomorrow will be the last day that I won't be able to talk to him because at least while he is on the 20 hour drive back on Saturday, I should be able to chat with him on the phone. This makes me quite happy!

This is the longest amount of time that I have been away from him since having Noelle. This has been a really challenging week. All of the loneliness, silence, and just longing to have his company around aside, it has been a busy week where I would ordinarily really need his help, want his opinion, rely on his expertise, and cherish his support. It's amazing how you truly don't understand how much you need your spouse until they are not there (for any amount of time, really), and when you have a child, that need is multiplied by about 10,000.

Luke is a super wonderful dad, a supportive husband, and in general just a great, positive person to be around, so not having him here (both in person and on the phone) has been so tough. This week, I had several photo sessions, my glucose test at the doctor's office, a lot of school stuff to get done, and some housing stuff to take care of in Indy. Not to mention this was basically my last full week of summer break, so I really didn't want to spend it frantic and frazzled and lonely, but I did the best I could. I'm thankful for all the babysitting help and people who were there to keep me company this week.

However, through it all, even though I absolutely cannot stand when Luke is gone this long, I feel a sense of strength and accomplishment. I was able to swallow my fears of being alone, to handle responsibilities and duties that aren't normally mine, and to be strong for my daughter when even she quietly whispered in bed, "I miss Papa."

So, I find myself both wishing for Sunday to hurry up and get here and for the week to slow down (only because I will be starting school one week from tomorrow), but since sacrifice was the theme of the week, I'll go ahead and just hope for this week to end as quickly as possible.

The Balancing Act

Long time, no blog.

If you think this one's bad...you should see my photography blog. It is sooooo out of date that it's not even funny. I don't think I've written a quality post there since the beginning of the summer. BAH!

I'm struggling with balancing my life right now. If I had a balance (like an actual balance that you, well, balance things on), it would be heavily weighted down by SCHOOL/PHOTOGRAPHY, and the other side floating so high up in the air would be the FRIENDS/FAMILY/EXERCISE/HOBBIES/FUN side.

Ugh. Big, fat UGH.

How do people do it? And by people, I mean the cute little put together moms who always look so polished and refreshed as they beebop out the door to work, and then arrive home just in time to get an amazing dinner started with a bottle of wine on the table just as their hott hubby strolls in and says "Thanks, Babe, you're the BEST!" all before she puts on her yoga pants and sweats it out so she doesn't look like a fat, frumpy mess? I KNOW there are women out there like this, and I just want to BE one of them.

There's got to be something that can be removed from my plate. I think what I am going to have to start doing is leaving school at 4:00 no matter what. I can't keep staying until 5:00 or 5:30. It's not good for my sanity or for Noelle's. I NEED to be able to decompress and have some time in my evening. I NEED to be able to wind down and breathe and relax and enjoy the things I used to enjoy, such as exercising and sewing and crafting and other things.

So, I'm going to do it. I'm leaving at 4:00 and you can't stop me!

As for photography, I am way over-scheduled. I am behind on sessions, and I am putting my foot down that I am no longer scheduling sessions from now until January. I can't. I won't. I need to have a break.

I think I would feel so much better if I had time for some physical activity. I miss Zumba so much and the friends I made there over the course of 2 1/2 years. I enjoyed that outlet a lot and I have been hesitant to try it in Muncie because I know it won't be as good as Fishers. I know this because the instructor in Fishers is DA.BOMB and that's all there is to it. So I am being a Bitter Betty about it and am digging my heels in. As a result? I'm getting fatter. By the DAY!

The joys!

I wish I could write a non-whiny post. But I can't. I tried. Didn't work.

So, here I sit. Saturday night. Luke's on call. I am about to embark on an editing extravaganza to end all editing extravaganzas. Don't you wish you were me?