Principle 5

Humbled.  This is how I felt after I read Principle 5 in the book, "God Will Make a Way." I haven't picked it up in a while. To be quite honest, I haven't really felt like I needed to. Luke and I really have made strides in the right direction since airing out our fears and thoughts and feelings and emotions with Abe & E. However, we got into a heated discussion last night about marriage and expectations and where we thought we were on this continuum of married life....and we found ourselves frustrated and probably quite upset. We have never, ever doubted the love we have, but the outside factors of med school, teaching 4th grade, commuting, board exams, and of course the miscarriage that ROCKED our world 6 months ago have weighed heavy on our hearts and have been holding us down both individually and as a couple.

We discussed the need for both of us to experience some maturation within ourselves...that we have to change how we handle our own life situations before we can contribute anything to the marriage. Bettering ourselves will only better our marriage. 

Well, I felt compelled to read the book last night before bed, and Principle 5 was about accepting blame and fault, and GROWING UP! I was reading the chapter with my mouth open wide, amazed and humbled by not only the words I was reading but the feelings I was experiencing in my heart. I couldn't believe the irony....and then I realized it of course was not irony at all. It was God working for us, within us....

The chapter was about a man and a woman whose marriage was struggling, and the man finally left. The woman initially was mad at him and blamed him for everything like she had done throughout the whole marriage, but after a lot of prayer and insight from other people, she realized that she was blaming her husband for things that she was responsible for. She was not accepting her role in the marriage failure. She spoke about the moment she realized that she needed to get herself organized, find happiness, and grow up....and she needed to apologize to her husband for blaming him for everything. When she did that, he forgave her and they lived a happy, happy life and rich marriage together. 

This situation isn't exactly like ours. Luke hasn't left, and we aren't miserable. However, I am disorganized and immature a lot of the time, and these character traits really affect our progress toward a fulfilling, blissful, peaceful, and easy marriage. Luke was blown away as well by the chapter in the book, and we feel blessed to have read those words at the most perfect time.