It's that time of year

Sometimes I enjoy seeing just how tired I can make my mind and body. Just when I think I have reached a new state of exhaustion, I push myself to the next level and feel an all new sense of accomplishment. 

I only wish this was talking about exercising.

Currently, I am eye-ball deep in photo editing for clients who are dying to get Christmas cards ordered, printed, and mailed by, well, Christmas, which is promptly following in 2 weeks. I am so grateful for the "business," but I am absolutely going nuts over the amount of time it takes to complete such tasks. I keep having to remind myself that it is one day at a time, and often one hour at a time.

It's the time of year for me to be putting together the Ernstberger family highlight video that I have done for probably 4 or 5 years now. I always enjoy giving it to the family when we celebrate our Christmas together and taking the time to reflect over the past year in photos. I have been going through my albums and I found a lot of nothing. Don't misunderstand, I took some great photos of Noelle and I am so thankful to have the physical proof that those memories exist somewhere in my tired mind, but I also found a shortage of photos that show that we actually did anything worthwhile over the past year. This is a depressing thought...

I've been a bit weepy and sad over the past few weeks...maybe even months. I'd like to say I don't know why-- but actually I know exactly why. Luke and I want to expand our family and we have been quite unsuccessful in that endeavor for a relatively long time. It's hard to remain faithful and optimistic at a time like this. I don't expect sympathy or really for anyone to care. I don't write this blog for anyone but myself-- but if you pray and want to shoot one up for our family, I'd appreciate it.

So, as we head into these last two weeks of this holiday season, I'm trying my best to renew my spirit, restore my faith, establish optimism, and take a few deep breaths. All will be well, all will get finished...and sooner or later, I'll get the gift I'm really asking for.