Ready to Be Done

I really never thought I would get to this point. I have loved pregnancy and all the great things that have come along with it. I have loved buying baby things. I have loved setting up the nursery. I have loved buying new clothes (until that no longer became fun due to expense and the fact that you can put a really nice shirt on a barn, but it is still a freakin' barn). I have loved getting asked about my baby by friends, family, and strangers. I have loved feeling the baby move, thump, kick, turn, flip, and hiccup. I have loved the fact that I still have not one stretch mark (fingers crossed for the next 6 weeks!).

But....I am tired. Exhausted actually. I don't sleep well. My fuse is growing shorter by the day at school. I am antsy and anxious. I am like a kid waiting for Christmas to arrive, or like a child in the back seat asking, "Are we there yet?" 5 minutes into a drive to Florida. I am nervous. I am on edge. I am in pain when it comes to my joints. I hate the swelling in my feet and hands. I am READY to be DONE!

I have taken all the classes. I have read books and magazines and Internet articles. I am ready to put my knowledge to use and have this baby and then attempt to raise and parent it. I want to know if it is a boy or a girl. I want to see who this baby looks like. The anticipation is KILLING me!

It is too early. I know this. I know that I want my baby to "bake" as long as humanly possible. I know that wishing for an early childbirth is not a good thing. I know it is selfish on my part. I know my baby loves being in its environment and doesn't want to come out for another month+, but how I help myself in the meantime?

I am twiddling my thumbs, analyzing every cramp and contraction (have had a few more Braxton Hicks lately). I am jealous of women I know either getting ready to have their babies in a week or have already had them. What a silly thing to be jealous of.... gah.

It all comes from a good place. I am just so excited, so ready, so happy, so in love with this baby already that I just want to claim the prize at the end of this journey.

Does anyone else think that 9 months is a HECK of a long time to be pregnant? And does anyone else think that it is a crock that they tell you it is 9 months but really it is 40 weeks...which...do the math. THAT IS REALLY 10 MONTHS!

Lord, help me... 49 days.